Texts from Last ight

[Badem]

You ever woken up and wondered what teh hell you did and what these weirds texts are?

http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/recent/2

(857): seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.

(314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present

reminds me Fuck My Life lol

[Mordhak]

Those examples sucked. This one is better.

(636): dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
(1-636): when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced

[seinnej]

(612): What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?

[StrawberryClock]

(651): Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.

Hah, idiot patriots.

[xKilljoy187]

(512): Can Purell be used as lube?